Friday, November 16, 2018
Bombay
Visiting the Ophthalmologist with Dad and Dinner in a Parsi Household
Namaste from Bombay!
What's great about living in Bombay is that every single day is different! When I wake up in the morning, I always have something special to which I can look forward. Today, it was Parsi 'bhonu' (dinner) at the home of a friend. But first, I had to accompany Dad to see his ophthalmologist.
Accordingly, I awoke at 5.30, caught up with the news through Twitter for an hour. Twitter also introduced me to a lovely new Christmas TV commercial made by the British department store John Lewis that partnered with Elton John to create a heartwarming film about the significance of gifting. Surprisingly, the commercial has received very mixed reviews from the public--people either adore it or think it is just another publicity gimmick for EJ's new album coming soon ("Rocket Man"). As for me, I loved it. Do You Tube it and take a look--it's worth it, really!
Next, I blogged, then, went over my tasks for the day, washed, gulped down a cup of coffee while downloading The Times on my iPad and dressed for the gym. I worked out for an hour and got home for a breakfast of chocolate croissant (bought from Prithvi last night) and two slices of bread with Nutella and peanut butter--this part of my day is predictable and has fallen neatly into my morning routine. From this point on, it's different each day.
Off to the Ophthalmologist with Dad:
Dad has suffered from macular degeneration for years. By the grace of God, for about 5-6 years, his eyesight has remained stable and doctors have never recommended any treatment. His left eye has been worse than his right because he has a hole in his retina--his right one compensates for the lack of sight in the left. Every year, when I am in Bombay, I go with him to his ophthalmologist. He kept telling me that his eyesight has detioriated badly and that he has real difficulty reading now. He can barely recognize people unless they are right in front of him. Given his limitations, his soldiering forward with the daily tasks of his life and looking after Russel simply takes my breath away! Only heavenly blessings could have placed in my life a man who is an hourly source of inspiration to me--of what it means to face adversity bravely and smilingly and with an abundance of faith.
That said, I arrived at Dad's at 11.00 am to spend a half hour with Russel (who had just finished his session with his physiotherapist) before Dad and I left by rickshaw for Hill Road where the clinic is located. Our appointment was for 11.45--we got there at 11. 25 am. We only left from there at 3.00 pm-if you can even believe it!!!!
Long story short, Dad was right. His right eye which was holding steady now has retinal traction. This development exists side by side with age-related macular degeneration. The solution is surgery, but there is only 10-20 % chance that it would be a success and there is no guarantee that it would make any difference at all. The doctors suggested that we return to see them after 2 months and if the condition has deteriorated further, perhaps surgery could be done. If it holds steady, it could be avoided. Dad was deeply disheartened--poor chap! He has decided that he will not undergo surgery. We will all simply continue to pray.
A Word About the Ophthalmology Clinic on Hill Road:
I have never been inside a more disorganized ophthalmology clinic! By the end of that long visit, during which we were kept waiting for hours because the doctor was in the middle of a complicated surgery, there was no water available, no magazines of any kind to browse through, nothing--and this was supposedly one of the better clinics in Bombay that boasts state-of-the-art everything! Yeah right!!! I kept missing our lovely US clinics where there is a TV set, magazines, tea and coffee stations--I suppose we are a spoiled lot.
As for the doctors, there were two of them consulting together (which is a good thing) over Dad's case as to what should be the best options for him. But Dad's doctor did not even sit down--he kept standing up and addressing me (as if Dad were not even in the room). As the two doctors consulted with each other, one looking at a computer screen, the other standing casually and addressing me, about three personnel trooped in and out to discuss things with them--one was the doctor's wife who was hassled about some 'trackers' not being delivered, another was a nurse who had questions about another patient while the doctors were dealing with Dad, a third was a paramedical person who also walked in and out, asked the doctors about a case she was dealing with and came back twice in the same minute! It was simply disgusting!
Had I not had to worry about the future of Dad's sight, I would have made such a scene, believe me, and stomped out in frustration! This is the sort of thing that people in India put up with--because they think their doctors are Gods! Even poor Dad who has high tolerance thresholds was so dejected when we were in the rickshaw together getting home. He told me that doctor did not even sit down to address my concerns!
I was furious but I did not want to let him see my anger; so I simply controlled by tongue--consider this my belated attempt at venting! For all our pains, we were charged Rs. 1, 200 for the 'consultation'--it was anything but! This experience convinces me that even if I move to Bombay, I will make twice yearly trips back to the US to get all my medical attention there--at least I can be sure I will get attention! Here, Dad and I were treated like vermin who happened to stray into the clinic and had to be whisked off as quickly as possible. A truly rotten experience!
I only had the time to drop Dad home before I sat in the same rickshaw and had the driver drop me off at my studio. It was 3. 15 when I had a very late lunch: my new tiffin had been left outside my door and I enjoyed chicken curry, cutlets and a mixed vegetable with potatoes. It was only about 3.45 that I could actually begin my own work--a whole day had gone at an eye-doctor's! Unbelievable!
Completing my Work for the Day:
I had been determined to finish off the syllabus design for the second course that I am designing for St. Xavier's new PG course in English as I wanted to email it to Pearl, the head of the English Department there, before I left for my evening's appointment. Accordingly, I focussed earnestly on the task at hand and in about an hour, it was all done. I also had to email my CV to someone and I had a couple of urgent emails to which I responded.
Off to Dinner:
I jumped into the shower at 5.45, got dressed and left my house on schedule at 6.15 (as I had intended) for my 8.00 pm dinner appointment at Peddar Road in the city. Yes, I gave myself a lot of time as I know that traffic is notorious in Bombay and I did not want to be late. Peddar Road is located in the sort of place that does not lend itself to a train ride--always the speedier option. Hence, I took a 220 bus that brought me to the connecting bus-stop at Linking Road from where I waited for a good 20 minutes before the 84 bus came along. That was probably one of the longest waits for a bus that I have experienced in Bombay so far.
Still, it was a good journey. I kept myself busy with my phone and in exactly an hour, I was at Peddar Road and looking for the home of my friend Kamal to which I was going for the first time. I rang her doorbell at exactly 8.00 am--on the dot--and happened to be the first guest to arrive.
At Kamal's for Dinner:
I met Kamal, two years ago, when she was on a holiday in London. I was there with my friend Shahnaz. We had made plans to meet my friend Firdaus who was also on vacation there. He brought Kamal, his friend, along. The four of us spent almost an entire day together exploring the South Bank--from Wobbly Bridge to Borough Market. We'd had such a great time. Kamal and I have renewed contact at the many events at the NCPA where she is a regular attendee with Firdaus. When she invited me to dinner at her place in the fabulous old Parsi Colony, designed in the 1930s by Italian architects, I was delighted to accept. I had never been to this Parsi Colony before and I had no idea how glorious these flats are--they seem to go on and on and on--there are so many rooms and they are unbelievably spacious!
It turns out that Kamal is also a brilliant decorator with a magnificent eye--she has decorated her home entirely with antiques (Indian and Western ones)--the furniture is either from Chor Bazaar (beautifully re-upholstered and refurbished) or Oshiwara in Jogeshwari and the accessories are from all-around the world. You cannot get visually bored in such a home. You can get visually tired, yes, but never bored.
Kamal gave me the Grand Tour, introduced me to her son Sohrab who was just leaving with his girl friend Dina and set me down with a cold glass of water. Five minutes later, the first guests arrived: my friend Firdaus with a Parsi couple, Farokh and Maneck, who were visiting from London. Next came a threesome--a couple of sisters, Shirin and Dina and Dina's husband Bobby. I was the only non-Parsi in the gathering of eight. It turned out that Shireen and I, who were meeting after about 25 years, had close long-ago links: links that go back to the 1980s to my study at the Alliance Francaise de Bombay where Shireen continues to be the Receptionist, PA to the Director and everything in-between. We had a lovely long chinwag as we caught up with everything. Shireen brought up names from my long-forgotten past and it was a real joy to reconnect with her. Maneck happens to be the sister of the great Homi Bhabha, the God of Post-Colonial Critical Theory, based at Harvard! Her husband Farokh teaches English as a Foreign Language to executives in London. Dina and Bobby have returned to live in Bombay from Dubai where they spent 40 years! So you can imagine, conversation was simply scintillating. There was never a dull moment as Kamal plied us with drinks--I actually had two G and Ts! Red wine flowed and snacks were passed around as we seated ourselves in her gorgeous living room with a coffee table made from a village plough!
Dinner was equally amazing: we had a salad of watermelon and feta cheese with mint, a baked casserole of sausages and cheese sauce, a tuna macaroni casserole, plus Parsi mutton pullao and dal--so so delicious. Desert was an incredibly boozy Dark Chocolate Truffle Cake--my personal heaven on a plate! We were all blown away!
I only left Kamal's at 11.45 pm, slipped into a cab and reached home at 12. 05. With no traffic at that hour and the Sea Link aiding our journey, we flew towards home. I merely changed and got into bed.
What a day! Thankfully our ordeal of the morning was completely forgotten by the hospitality and friendship of the evening.
Until tomorrow...
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